Friday, October 28, 2011

Time to Be Personal Again

This thing has been in the drafts for too long. I don't know why I haven't published this. It's now freaking October and the items are for August/September!!! Well October brought about a lot of issues so it might still be applicable. :)

Now is the time!

Time to make the blog personal again! > This one really sounds similar to a computer company's ad slogan before and yet it is exactly what I need. I don't keep a diary/journal of my life - imagine if anything's supposed to be a secret, you must leave no possible evidence behind! So pretty much all items I have are open to public reading and scrutiny. Read: Evidence = Paper Trail = Diary.

Friends summed up August for me and since we work in the same place, the career thoughts are also similar:

- Trusting the wrong people or "friends." Bullies never grow up. They have deep unseated insecurities in life. Awww. Tss. -.-
There will be bullies wherever you go. These are people who need to instill fear in the consciousness of people in order to assert their so-called influence, or to protect such influence from becoming irrelevant.
But at the end of the day, these are simply individuals filled with insecurities that they can only cover up by making others submit to their will.
I don't get why people put up with such behavior but I do understand that it's better to be on the safe side because there are perks to that. It's okay to just keep quiet or laugh along with their "witty" jokes making fun of other people rather than being on the receiving end of their wrath.
To that I say, what the fuck! We're simply reinforcing their actions if we don't question them and it further gives them a license to treat people in such a way. It's like explicitly allowing colorum buses to run wild in EDSA. It simply shouldn't happen.
No one has to go through the experience of being shamed through negative tweets, offensive status messages, and maybe direct confrontation and no one has the right to subject others through those things. 
(Bondoc, 2011
- Frustrations are not like the existence of rain showers and thunderstorms in a tropical country which just pop out like zits and you can't do anything about it. It's because one has set certain expectations and disappointment is part and parcel of that. I have set the bar high and I'm willing to work my tendons to not just reach it, but go over it. Competitive as agreed, which is why I willingly endured all sacrifices (lifestyle according to pay, time, and work requirements) all for the sake of experience and better opportunities. Maybe I got the experience right, although I'm not sure on the opportunities part. Maybe we have different priorities in life and posting an ultimatum on getting things done might or might not work for me (hello it may even backfire!). I don't want to just go with the flow and let life take you as you ride along to its course. Control freak much? Boohoo, unlucky me.

I am not fond of waiting. I never was. It has always been similar to "what I want, I want it now" or okay if not now, maybe a little later but it must be in the time frame that I can still remember (because I might be matampuhin and ditch the whole idea if I don't get it right away). If this is the time I have to learn how to wait, well, hopefully this is that part already. Patience is keeping a positive disposition while waiting. It is a virtue after all. :|

Maybe I have to be a little loose. Learn to sail with the wind and use it to my advantage, because I'm sure as tweaking my own propellers to go in the same direction.

MORAL: Aside from getting a regular font, thanks Rach for the life lessons you have shared.

Take away all the people (and things) that make me sad, disappointed, and worried. I will take away all the negative vibes that this month brought into my life. I will take away expectations, unrequited love, people with so many issues, and irritating/negative ones. So, if you're one of the ones mentioned above, I'm sorry but I do not have room for you in my life :) Again, I do not need lots of people to share this journey with, I just need the right ones :)
Take one day at a time, one role at a time, one friend at a time, one project at a time, one boy at a time, one experience at a time, and I am sure, things will be way better than this month :)
Surround myself with people who make me happy and inspired, of people who want to be part of my life, with people who care enough with what I'm feeling, and with people whom I can trust.
(Dimaculangan, 2011)

Yes. Life's too short to feel all crappy about crap (people include). These lessons aren't like pills wherein you just need to swallow to feel better. Having this kind of disposition would take time to develop, well at least for me, and yet I know this would yield a better world in the perspective of a mermaid.

No comments: