Monday, September 19, 2016

nawalan na ng gana ang tadhana
nanlalamig yung dating nagbabaga

ang sabi mo walang hanggan
ba't nandito tayo sa dulo

pangako mo walang hanggan
bakit nandyan ka sa dulo?

pwede bang kalimutan mong may dulo
handa ako sa walang hanggan
pangako mong walang hanggan
akala ko walang hanggan

pero nandito tayo sa dulo

kung ika'y mawawala sa aking piling
dinggin mo ang aking bilin
lingon ka lang paminsan minsan
dito lang ako di ako lilisan

sa ating dulo

di ako lilisan

Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Ang daming nakapila sa Drafts pero ito uunahin ko:

Kung tingin mo unfair para sa iyo at tingin niya unfair para sa kanya, at walang gustong magbigay, baka mas fair sa inyong dalawa na huwag na lang. Huwag niyo na lang ituloy.

Sunday, March 27, 2016


My sister got engaged last March 12, 2016 and I was nowhere near Manila then. I was out in Badian, Cebu canyoneering and holding on to dear life. I was just told of the event (it's a surprise, I mean, who tells the girl she's going to be proposed to?) a week before, meaning I've confirmed my reservations and have committed to my friends. I know I'm questioning myself as to how I chose to proceed with my Cebu and Boracay trip while my only sister is getting engaged. It was supposed to be "just" a birthday dinner of her boyfriend, Kuya LJ, of 6 years.

Yaya Belle sent me a video of the event the same night and when I watched it, waterworks happened. My friend who's close to the family and was with me in the trip, cried, too. When our other friend came into the room and saw us crying, "Ay. What happened? Are you guys crying??" The usual retort while wiping our eyes with a "duh" tone we just had to say, "Ay hindi. Sinipon lang kasi may pinanood kami."

I heard of the full story when I got back to Manila. So my sister had no idea about it and she usually discovers the plans of Kuya LJ before he can pull it off. She said she initially thought during their anniversary that her boyfriend was going to propose. I was part of THAT surprise! Turns out he really planned to propose then; however, there's one major thing that didn't go as planned - the ring was not yet available. After that she didn't want to get her hopes up anymore. And so on that day, my sister was told by her boyfriend to wear a dress he got her before. He also was able to convince her to have her nails done a few days before. He didn't say where they'll be going (as they are weekend warriors, out travelling on weekends) so he just said she bring a lot of clothes. They might go surfing in La Union or up in Baguio or wherever. 

My sister said she was amazed by the family's acting skills. It was just like a lazy Saturday for them. My dad even had a haircut and had his hair dyed. "Dad, bakit ka nagpapa-dye?" "Gusto ko lang bakit ba." My niece was just following her all the time and tried to foil the plan by saying my sister's boyfriend visited the house. Good thing Yaya Belle was quick to add a few words to make my sister dismiss what was said. Such a sumbongera kid. ­čśé

What my sister didn't know, after she was picked up, everyone else took a bath, quickly prepared, and went to the venue. They even joked, "Ninang, sama raw Chesca sa 'yo!" And when the couple went to their dinner venue, Kuya LJ changed to a long sleeved polo and slacks from white shirt and tsinelas to which my bruha sister said, "Ay bakit ikaw bihis na bihis ako mukhang naka-rubber shoes?!" "Birthday ko eh!" Fiiiine. Haha. She was also surprised she saw my mom there. "Errr why are you here?" "Birthday ni LJ," ignored her and proceeded to walk somewhere else. When she saw lots of people, she already had an idea and she was getting nervous.  

He said he practiced, even going down on one knee in front of their boy, and yet he was so anxious that day he even took a bath twice to which his friend pointed out. He was sweating it out and couldn't hear well as his heart was pounding really loudly. 

Kuya LJ forgot his lines, cried his eyes out, broke the case of the ring (for some reason he can't open it!!) in the process, but when he got down on one knee, you know it'll be a yes.

A lot of anecdotes, photos where my sister looked like she's wearing rubber shoes while getting proposed to, everyone bawling their eyes, and kids screaming and crying with the crowd. I may have missed the moment when that memory happened, but I'll be pretty damn sure to be there for more stories worth sharing to the world. 

Monday, March 21, 2016

I remember the time my friend and I brought with us a plush toy of a dog, named Russell, and pretended he was a puppy. We even brought him with us in the restaurant and carried him while walking around UP Technohub. Good times. :)

Sunday, March 06, 2016

In the Mourning

I have never read something more suited to my "morning" life than this. In fact, it made me write this entry!

This is why companies with flexible hours are so appealing to me. If I get a job with a specific time-in and time-out, I'd probably be laid off in a month (read #9). Mind you, I've had progress from showing up 2x a week, to showing up every day in the office. There is no routine in my life, except when I worked in Makati because I have to catch the company shuttle from Eastwood to Makati. And it is set that either I take the 6:30 AM ride or the 7:00 AM ride. If I miss out the 7:00 AM ride, I might just pray, cry, or wish I was sick because there is no way C5 and EDSA would part a la Red Sea for me. Traffic can be a motivation, but not that much.

Taken from Buzzfeed

I even have a timer for 3 minutes - fooling myself to
wake up after 3 minutes. Imagine the impact those minutes can bring me each day.
Back to the golden Buzzfeed post.

#s 1-6,
Every morning I question my existence. How at my age, I'm still a lazy ass rolling out of bed instead of waking up with a "hello, sunshine!" smile plastered on my face. I just can't. It's one of those things I can't pretend to like. Of course, waking up means you're alive but life doesn't register that early* to me. It's a daily struggle.

Coffee doesn't help me in a way that it makes me feel better about myself  life. I need coffee because I treat it as my responsibility juice - once I take it, I have no excuses left anymore.

Taken from Buzzfeed.


Seriously, nothing is more important than continued sleep. Supposed to be meeting a friend? Fuck friendship.

This says a lot. It's why I haven't accepted a brunch invite in years. Oh wait, I did. I just didn't sleep till we were done with the brunch. Next thing I know, I'm ready for a midnight snack. If ever I get a breakfast date, I'd probably be dozing off (since I won't sleep to be able to make it to "breakfast" time) or zombie-ing it out. Not good for any social life.

It's also the reason why I always miss out the breakfast buffet in hotels. Who eats from 6-9 AM?! It should be 11 AM - 2 PM! Justice!!! Include #11 on this, I don't do breakfasts. Nopies.


Supposed to be in class, getting an education to give you a better shot in life? OH WELL.

The moment we had freedom to choose/make our schedule back in college was one of the happiest moments in my life. Most if not all of my classes started 1:30 PM. Uh-huh. I wasn't born at 6:05 PM (I checked my birth certificate) to be a morning person.


The very best thing about the weekend is, of course, the fact that you can sleep in.

I love you so much if we're meeting on the weekend when the sun is still up. There has been a lot of times that I woke up to see my family having dinner downstairs. And there were even times they had to check in on me to see if I'm still alive or if I have died in my sleep. 

#10, 22
I still do believe that tomorrow will be the day I will wake up in the morning with a perfectly good mood that it'd make me want to start writing a journal. Who said we're not hopeful people?!

#23, 24
Yes, I have given permission to folks at home to kick my bed, slap me, shout at me, or whatever is needed for me to wake up early - let's say I have an appointment in the embassy or an exam, or something really important (because it will be unimportant if we leave the judgment to my waking self). I have also tried to convince myself that an early morning jog/run is the best way to make me fit and the only way that would happen is if I sleep with my running attire already.

Taken from Buzzfeed.

*early is purely subjective for me

Saturday, February 27, 2016

Wine Caller

It's supposed to be cellar, but we don't have one.

Presenting... My baby wine collection!!! Ok. It's actual just my stash. We don't have a proper wine storage area and based on the photo below, I don't even store my wines properly (they should be horizontal so the cork doesn't dry up).

The real issue here is that I tend to drink them. You know what I'm saying? Just look at that gew├╝rztraminer inviting you to drink. Dayuuum. It's calling out my name each time my sight chances upon them. Whenever I visit Ralph's or S&R or some other wine place (I got the Vinas del Vero from Barcino), I grab a bottle or 2. I'm starting to think I should always grab 2 bottles of each kind. One for drinking and the other for storage. It drinks up my wallet, too. :(

I always say, "I used to be an alcoholic now I'm a workaholic." I think it we'll meet in the middle now. I initially thought of storing these wines and just open them in 4 years. Yet, at the rate of my life at present, it's going to be a challenge!

I also accept donations of all kinds! Cabernet, merlot, shiraz, riesling, sauvignon blanc, I'm fine with it. :) :) :)

Thursday, February 18, 2016

Happy Birthday, Yo!

Hallo, February!!!

UP Fair. To celebrate the end of the 12th and of welcoming the 13th.

This is the part where we say, "Oh, please! I don't want to get older! Wiser, yes, older, awww hell no!"

Tuesday, February 02, 2016

Kung puso ko ay imamapa. Ikaw ang dulo, gitna't simula.

Nahanap din kita.

At maligaw man at mawala. Umikot man sa kawalan. Sa bawat kailan, sino't saan.

Ikaw lamang ang kasagutan.

Saturday, January 23, 2016

There's Bipolar, Where's Fragmented?

Up Dharma Down has been in the music industry for quite some time. Not to be hipster or to be such a music snob, but they made a "grand comeback" and got catapulted (again?) in the mainstream world when they released Capacities in the market around 4 years ago. It's okay to share your favorite bands with the world. It's okay. Even if most just know a song or two, it's totally fine. Sure. They're screaming and paying anyway, just like you and I. It's okay.

My friend told me one day that she's mournful when she realized she doesn't have a copy of Capacities. Yep. I guess we stood still for quite some time after that. SOOOO... First order is to scout where to score their CDs.

She felt like this when she realized (I think while cleaning her room) that
she doesn't have a copy of UDD's album all this time.

And after a quick research and some inquiries... We braved Saguijo on a Saturday night for a Terno gig. Inside Saguijo (not our first time), we wondered again and again where the fire exits are (still dunno) and how we'll survive in the event of a calamity. This post is not about our experience in Saguijo but more on the search for the album/s. That experience deserves an entire entry of its own. Ugh.

The trip to Makati was worth it as they were selling CDs at the entrance and poof, that's Php400 a pop for you, ma'am and sir. It's okay, you're paying for expensive missed opportunities and great music anyway. The sad part? I can't find Fragmented and they're not printing those anymore!


Sunday, January 17, 2016

There were lots of articles that have sprung out over the week taking into consideration Baby Boomers and Millennials. They have covered a lot of topics from taxes, inflation, bills, signed policies, even success stories. One article I read mentioned that success stories of Baby Boomers were about perseverance and powering through time. While Millennials' are about who did something different when they were young and got a lot from it over time.

Friday, January 15, 2016

I don't usually read ThoughtCatalog posts, but this one was beautiful and painful.

All I know is chasing someone who doesn’t want me anymore; craving for his attention, controlling every detail so that it will be as I wanted it to be and forcing him to love me as I love him. I only cared about my happiness and not his. I didn’t care about what he wanted, what he feels. I didn’t care about the fact that maybe he wanted to be free, to live life without me, or maybe he wanted to love someone else other than me. I didn’t care about any of those things. I only cared about how I felt, how much I want him, how much I needed him, and how much I can’t live without him.
And that’s not love. That’s desperation at it’s finest. Selfishness in all forms.

Sunday, January 10, 2016

When Echosmith Sang

(For my personal reference, concert was last Aug 13, 2015. I know. Don't judge me.)

It has been a looooong time since I have watched a performance I bought a ticket to, like concert tickets. Not only have I been recounting where my money went, but it's more like I haven't seen an artist lately that made me jump off from the couch and purchase a ticket right then and there.

Then my supposed-to-be-secret-band who went mainstream for some reason was coming to the country, I didn't go. They were part of a music fest and I don't want to be part of it. Then a few months later, they announced that they'll be back in Manila for a solo show. You know that cliche - when you love someone, set him/her free and when they come back... You have to see them live. So, I don't care if they're mainstream now and even if I had to ship my CD all the way from the US (thanks to Amazon and my aunts and uncles who always let my things ride with them) and purchase another one in Dubai (for my friend), I know I'm going to see them live!

And... Echosmith was there. Live. They are tall kids. What I didn't expect though is that their music's main market are KIDS. Kids entering puberty stage. Kids who were accompanied by their older siblings or being waited for by their parents outside the concert hall. Kids who are shorter than me - and this comment coming from me means they are short! I can see the line ahead of me. I didn't even bother to move and adjust my head. Nopes. But we don't care now. Everything's fair in love, war, music, and math.

By the way, since I have a bad habit of revisiting past memories, this is my official declaration: I regret not getting tickets when Tegan and Sara and The xx went to Manila.

Now I feel bad. :(
When you spend too much time on Facebook, you can attest that there are throngs of articles/posts about x things you can find in a (insert a positive adjective here) partner, or date a person who (insert your favorite verb here), or don't date people with these qualities, etc. A lot of tips, advice, and suggestions. Someone who's recently hurt or in love (hurt and love in one sentence, wow) would say that when you  find someone and fall in love, most (if not all) of the time, everything else gets thrown out of the window - yes, including all of the advice you've read or all of the telltale signs you've memorized. 

That makes it interesting. That makes love (or falling in love) both scary and exciting. 

(And I should probably stop posting things at 3:30am.)

Saturday, January 09, 2016

Old Coffee Talk

So I have decided to postpone completing my tasks that pay the bills and unearth all of  my posts that remained in the Draft status.

First post I chose to unearth? Coffee.

So what do we have here? It's a collection of the 2015 photos that I found lying somewhere under the forgotten lands in my phone.

Back to the coffee cup. Seen in this photo is our effort to make slow-drip coffee thanks to our empty margarita mix from Kirkland. Haha. We tied the plastic bottle and tried to hang it on the handle of the drawer on top. Well. When curiosity strikes and we've got nothing but time on our hands, you'll get this makeshift drip. Don't forget the pressure inside the bottle as it is dripped vertically. Or just don't do this at all. 

I have done a couple of batches of cold brew coffee (12-hour ones) at home and the best way to do it is teach people at home how to do it, too. Haha. I prepare it, leave a note, and my lovable yaya does the rest. I just call her up and she filters it. When I get home from the office, I have one mason jar of pure goodness. *smug face* Here's one small bottle of it, ready to bring anywhere I want. :)

And then we have this. Not sure if I posted it in my Taiwan entry (IF I HAVE ONE), but this sexy baby was purchased in Taipei. We were just walking towards a night market and poof. Something caught our peripheral vision we just had to turn our heads. A freaking coffee shop full of beautiful things. What a pretty sight, this syphon filter is!!! Also pictured below is my friend's manual grinder from Gloria Jean's. What a good day for coffee! Light them up!

When there's an espresso machine, it's always iced latte by the patio while waiting for the sun to kiss the plants. One's served with sugar and the other is just natural goodness. 

More coffee photos with some presence of wine, but not together. I have a regular single-serve pour-over filter but I remember that the old coffee makers (from my mom) made use of paper filters instead of the built in washable/reusable nylon ones they have now. So when I found it again, AHA! There you go. Easier to hand brew for a number of caffeine-regulars!

Coffee. It never gets old. Only we do. Huhu.

Saturday, January 02, 2016


Oh sheeeeeeeet! It's 2016! Time do pass by real quick now whether you like what you're doing or not.

Here's some balikbayan box level of fireworks for you and the beauty and madness that will be part of the whole 2016.

This baby can make you cry possibly 2 times. First is when it hits you and second when you see
the way how it lights up the sky so beautifully.

It's a wonderful feeling for a lot of people when they finish their planners, their calendars, and trying to write down all of their resolutions. I'm not all into the new year new life thing but the effect the new year brings to people? The opportunity it gives for people to reflect on their lives (or the "past" year)? It's amazing.

Happy New Year!

Have a Don Perignon and some tofu sisig in the process!

Always remember that "the days are long, but the years are short". Always remember that.