B And B

What's with the letter B? Beyonce and Britney. B and B? Beavis and Butthead. Bread and Butter. Blah and Blah? See?

I have mentioned before that watching Beyonce and the Pussycat Dolls is just like doing Hip Hop Abs or other aerobic exercises. I think I could do my own exercise video. You just have to sing Britney Spears' song Womanizer in normal volume (don't whisper the song or else it'll lose the purpose) then watch Beyonce's Single Ladies video.



There are a number of possible outcomes from it and I will end at magic seven:

1.) You end up not doing any.
2.) Your jaw fell when you saw the music video.
3.) You ended up watching Britney's music video for Circus instead.
4.) You fell asleep even before reaching this part of the entry.
5.) You sang Womanizer and did some of Britney's moves in the video.
6.) You sang If I Were A Boy instead and didn't dance at all.
7.) You were not able to do both (singing and dancing) but was able to keep-up with Beyonce's dance moves. Now, you're dead tired you could sleep for days.

Good job.


MORAL: If you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it. If you're a daddy-oh and you got the swagger of a champion. I'm sorry, too bad for you, you just can't find the right companion. Womanizer. If I were a boy? Whaaaat?!

The Yaya Sisterhood

Belly (or Yaya Belle for some) is sick. She has colds. So, she asked her sister, Sanny (Yaya Susan - you get the trend? Just add letter Y in every name and it's suddenly more fun to pronounce!) to buy orange. She stated it very clearly, "Could you buy me orange on your way home?" So Yaya Susan went home just now, and was very proud, "I bought you Royal! It's very big!"

Ugh. It's not Royal Tru-Orange soda Belly was referring to, but real fruit oranges.

Fail.

So we got into a conversation/sharing on how Royal Tru-Orange has affected the lives of many people. In the province, my yaya said that sometimes Royal is used as a viand when nothing else is available. Another said that it is used as medicine or "pusher" to make sick people eat again when they have lost their appetite.

Just yesterday, our neighbor asked my mom if there's anyone named Bacharo living with us. She said yes and said that it was Yaya Cathy's (my lola's yaya) maiden name. Our neighbor said, "Oh, I think she won in the raffle." My mom hurriedly told us about it and made Cathy summon her SSS card for identification purposes. She went around the barangay and found out true enough she won one of the major prizes - a TV. Here's the dilemma. My dad who was (I think he was) cleaning our car was approached by the Tanod and was offered to buy the raffle tickets. So he bought the tickets and forced all of our yayas to fill them up. So... What to do? My dad just sold the TV to Cathy for more than 50% off. BTW, Cathy lost 500 pesos to my Dad when she bet against Pacquiao.

Next time I'll introduce you to the members of the Yaya Sisterhood. They're loud and funny. Trust me.


MORAL: So what have we learned here? It is to listen to the other person clearly and try to remember what was said. If you thought you just heard a gargle or an odd sequence of sounds, s/he might be actually saying something! So clarify if you have problems or if you were not able to hear it properly. Also, I think I need to win something yet. My dad already won a Magic Sing, my sister some shopping GCs, Yaya Susan in her mini-Lotto sprees, and Yaya Cathy just recently, a TV. I can't remember if my brother has won anything yet.

Masamang Biyahe : Bad Trip

Man, mahaba ito. Masusubukan ang reading comprehension, endurance, at open-mindedness mo sa entry kong ito. Challenge ito, pare, challenge ito!

Ihanda ang iyong sarili sa isang impormal na Filipino entry. Kasi kung pormal (Ano ba other terms for formal sa Filipino? Tinatamad ako maghanap.) baka magsawa ka pangalawang pangungusap pa lang. Handa, basa.

Kanina wala kaming pasok sa Theology kasi may misa para sa mga Calatagan farmers. So, unang klase ko yung Philosophy class namin. Pumasok ako ng 10 minutes earlier than the usual time akong dumadating sa school kasi kailangan ko magsubmit ng reflection paper sa OSA. Teka simulan natin sa tricyle area sa Mini-Stop. May nauna sa akin na sumakay, tapos tinanong siya nung trike driver kung saan siya. Narinig ko (kasi chismosa ako) na sa library siya bababa. So nung tinanong siya kung special (kung mag-isa ka lang na bibiyahe special yun kasi solo ka eh, duh) na yung trip niya, tinuro niya ako na baka raw sasabay ako. Ganito nangyari sa usapan, "Saan ka?" tanong ng tricycle driver sa akin. "Xavier po," sagot ko. Nagkamot siya ng freaking ulo niya na obvious namang freaking hindi makati pero ang meaning niya since action speaks louder than words, "Sakay ka na lang sa iba." Pero dahil kuripot din yata yung nakasakay na female Atenista roon, sabi ko, "Manong, magkalapit lang ho ang Xavier and yung library." Matigas si Manong. Astig ka! Parang ayaw pa rin ako pasakayin hanggang nagreklamo na yung nakasakay sa loob, "Malapit lang yung Xavier at library," pilit niyang sinasabi. Kulit kasi eh. Magkalapit lang naman talaga yun.

So noong nasa loob na kami, kinausap ako nung babae. Mas tipid daw if dalawa or tatlo. Oo naman ako. Mahal na raw kasi magtrike lalo na kung mag-isa. Hello, nagrollback na nga ang gasolina pero ang mahal pa rin ng fare. Unfair! Bad trip. Pagdating ko sa OSA para magsubmit ng filler, SARADO ang hinayupak na office. Dahil daw sa Calatagan farmers kaya sarado sila. Eh 10 minutes na lang Philo class ko na. Bad trip! Mamaya na lang after ng Philo class ako magsusubmit.

Fast forward 4 hours later. Pumunta kami sa Gateway check lang if makanonood kami ng Bolt or Quarantine kung ano man yung swak sa oras. However, father, mother, brother, sister, WALANG malapit na showing. Yung Bolt in 3D, PHP 271. What the freaking heck?! Bad trip! Tinanong ko yung nagpupunit ng ticket sa entrance ng mga sinehan kung bakit mahal yung Bolt. "3D kasi siya, may kasamang 3D glasses." So hindi ko na naman napigilang magcomment, "Eh paano po kung may 3D glasses (may Hannah Montana 3D glasses kami courtesy of our cable provider) kaming dala? 271 pesos pa rin?" Oo raw, kasi may food na rin. Hmm, baka Pedigree or Alpo, di bale na lang. PHP271 pa rin yun. Dang, bad trip! Kumain na lang kami sa Taco Bell, benta ang order ni Joppet, Cheesy Fiesta Pota... What?! Pota?! Bad word! Tae ka, totoong nakasulat yun. Ito proof Pota-to kasi eh. May ADHD ka ba, sheez.


So tapos na yang POTA-to shiz, umuwi na lang kami kasi nga wala naman kaming mapapanood na iba dahil hindi nga swak yung screening schedule sa budget time namin. So makikipagkita na lang ulit ako sa kaibigan ko sa SM tapos diretso kami Robinsons Galleria para manood ng Quarantine or James Bond - kung anuman maabutan. WHAAAAAADAAAAAA, super traffic! Parang lahat ng tao biglang naisipang bumiyahe nang sabay-sabay! Bad trip! Diyahe, pare, bad trip! Hindi kami umabot sa schedule, late ng 30 minutes. Ayos naman, 9:40PM pa yung next showing. Hahahahachoo. Bad trip. Ayaw talaga ako papanuorin? Ay teka, bakit pala James Bond or Quarantine at hindi Bolt? Kasi may promo ang Robinsons na kapag doon ka manonood, may raffle coupon ka para sa raffle nilang 1-meter Bolt plush toy (shocks super cute masasapak mo katabi mo). Nagsearch ako ng screening schedules sa Operating Systems class namin habang nagdidiscuss yung teacher ko, boring siya, pare. Anyway, naghati ang Bolt and James Bond sa isang cinema. Sa bandang hapon ang Bolt, sa gabi James Bond. Bad trip hindi ako abot sa Bolt! So umuwi na lang kami kasi nga wala na, masiyado nang gabi. Goodness, traffic pa rin pauwi! Nagbus na lang kami kasi nga traffic parin, maghihirap ka kapag nagtaxi ka. Sa TV, palabas Eva Fonda starring Christine Reyes na super ganda at crush ko/namin. Iyon pa yung episode na gagahasain siya ni Baron-suck-my-face-manyakis-ako Geisler. Bad trip. So umuwi na ako, may dala nanay ko na pansit Malabon. For me raw, kasi walang sahog na epal (read: meat) so kain ako. Ayos 'Nay, walang lasa yung pansit Malabon. "Anak, hayaan mo na. Free lang kasi yan eh kaya tanggapin mo na kung walang lasa." Bad trip.

Bad trip count: 12


MORAL: Ang pagiging bad trip ay hindi relative at hindi subjective. Talagang bad trip lang. Ano magagawa mo? Wala. Mainis ka lang nang sandali kasi nga bad trip eh. Tapos magmove-on ka na. Habang nagtatype ako nito, nanonood ako ng Ellen, start na ng 12 Days of Christmas niya. Bad trip, gadgets galore ang first day! Tinuturuan ni Ellen ang audience niya na maging materialistic at mag-expect ng something in return always. Lagi pa naman akong nanonood ng Ellen, at yun ang moral ng show niya. Be materialistic because it is fun. Bad trip ka, 'tol.

Grand total bad trip count: 18 (including MORAL and Title)

Many Pacquiao

Yesterday, December 3, I have been thinking that maybe, this December is a weird one. First, the moon and stars formation and from Monday up to today (Thursday) and the Manny Pacquiao look-a-likes. You read that right. Manny Pacquiao look-a-likes. It's like they're everywhere! When I was in Cafe Xocolat last Monday, I told the people I am with, "Wow, the guy behind you looks like Manny Pacquiao." True enough, they looked behind and laughed. It's Manny Pacquiao reincarnated and surfing the Internet at the cafe. So what's next? I have been "seeing" Manny lately. Reincarnated into a student in the LRT, and reincarnated into a shop assistant in Greenhills. Okay, I really want to share this. Yesterday, while walking near the library, I saw a student trip and had a really good hang time. She looked around and smiled. I pretended not to see, but when she was out of earshot I laughed a little. Tripping is a natural phenomenon, just like Manny Pacquiao. Tae, what did I just type. Anyway, my blockmate and I talked and laughed about that poor, rich girl. So nearing the footbridge, we (actually she was the only one who talked crap about others because I can't do it) berated anyone/anything along the way. Then we remembered to go to the Guidance Counselor to have our mental health checked, no. We went there to schedule our annual guidance interview because Ateneans are losing the light so we need guidance. Tae ulit, what am I typing?! Then we went back to our original destination: the footbridge. To cut this crap short, my blockmate tripped/slid/sat on the last step and we were hysterical. She told me earlier that she didn't know her foot bled. Someone else while she's in the elevator (in her dorm) noticed it. Cool.

Happy Birthday, Jean!


MORAL: Who would miss Manny Pacquiao and papa Oscar de la Hoya's match? I won't because I have been seeing many Manny's lately. Hallucination is the best form of advertisement, better than tarps, radio and TV commercials combined.

*I just found the photo in Flickr. It's not mine. I have nothing to do with it. Haha.

Stars Are Blind

Hellooooo December!

Headlines: There's a happy formation of 2 stars and the moon. (Click the picture to see it uhm, better.)


So there's a smiley in the sky. Venus and Jupiter together with the moon, formed a "ü" formation in the night sky. Cool, right? So cool you need a jacket (man, I'm so corny today). Made a lot smile even for a while.

My day started rather nasty and weird. My mom thought I was possessed or something. Yesterday, we went to Novaliches/Bulacan to continue filming our documentary about faith healers. Then when we got home around 2 - 2:30pm, I welcomed our couch with open arms. After a few hours, my aunt and uncle paid a visit. I even joked about the Zwitsal cologne she was talking about (because she said when I was a kid it was my favorite), that the kid in the logo still doesn't have hair. Anyway, I woke up the next day and was fixed on the couch. I woke up (still with my Sunday clothes on) and saw my mom and brother in the dining area. The clock read 5:50 and I was . I was supposed to have a meeting today at 5:00 PM. I was like, "OHMYGOSH it's almost 6PM!!" I checked my phone and there were no messages like, "Hey, b*tch. You completely forgot we have a meeting a while ago. Where are you? You'd better have a good reason or you're probably dead by now."

I jumped out of the couch, checked my watch, it read Monday already and was completely disoriented. My brother turned the television on and I saw the morning show. Drat! It was just 6 in the morning. GREAT.


MORAL: Even though the gods are crazy, even though the stars are blind. If you show me real love baby I'll show you mine.

Repackage My CarcASS

Prepare for the music industry's antagonist.

Am I the only one pissed off with all those repackaged and re-released albums? Or everyone else is enjoying it and saying, "Good thing I waited for 100 years before buying a copy!" Some are getting stupid with the idea of album sales dwindling or not selling that much compared to before (not minding the inflation rate because we're counting the number of freaking copies sold). They're pointing fingers to piracy, illegal Internet downloads, and the likes. Yet there are those who download AND buy the CD as well. I am one of those stupid people who download and buy what the shiznits music companies are excreting from their corporate capital system. From here on, repackaged/re-released albums would be called as Ungrateful Tools Of Trade or UTOT. Honestly I would have used another acronym but what the hell. I'm so pissed (in an on-going process) I can't think anymore.

Colbie Caillat released an UTOT. Now I'm calling her Colbeach. She released it a few months after I bought her freaking CD! I'm the only one I know who bought her CD and she's punishing me?! Go drown in the beach, Colbeach. (Sense the hostility?)

PCD released one, too, but I don't mind because I haven't bought their CD yet. But if I get to buy their Doll Domination, I have to have the first album as well. I wish I'm not like that.

Alicia Keys released a Super Edition UTOT. KISS MY carcASS, AKeys! I understand I bought your album early 2008 and you just released your UTOT recently but WTHeck. I even watched your concert!

Leona Lewis, Duffy, Usher, Pink, Kelly Clarkson, Chris Brown (isa ka pa!) all released fatal UTOTs as well. It's like joketime in this world. Forever joketime.

Rihanna's Reloaded UTOT is a notorious one. Imagine she released both of the added songs as singles and they topped the charts they fell out of the list.

Mariah Carey releases 100 UTOTs in a lifetime. I'm going to buy that Super Duper Ultra Mega Hyper Deluxe Edition of Emancipation of Mimi. Eat dust, Nick Cannon.

Paramore's The Final Riot. Riot?! Decode is not even worthy of being downloaded illegally! So yeah Hayley Williams contributed to the success of the annoying series but what the hell. So The Final Riot! is a live version of the songs recorded during the band's concert in Chicago. Okay, Paramore's The Final Riot is forgiven.

Britney, I'm waiting. Are you going to release one, too? Or am I going to postpone buying Circus?


MORAL: Dang it. We're from 3rd World you know. Money spent for these CDs could have been used for far more important purposes/acts such as feeding programs, donations for the poor and the marginalized, buying food, adding them for my tuition fee, and paying bills. Yet, some choose to shell out money for CDs. Hoorah!

Twilight Vampires, Bite Me

What do you live for, if you can live forever and ever... Amen? Why is it that we read a lot of books, Twilight series included, yet most of us haven't even finished reading the Bible? Next week, if you go around Ateneo de Manila University and see a female reading the Bible during break times, that would probably me.

These days, if you haven't read or seen the Twilight, you're probably Patrick Star (read: living under a rock). I was bitten by Twilight because my blockmate introduced it to me a couple of years ago. I read Twilight way before it became a trend. That's not bragging, that's I-don't-know-what. Anyway, let's face it.

OK, even though I'm not a big fan of Twilight, I went on its first day of regular showing. Haha. So how was the movie? Of course, it was a fantastic (or fatal) treat for those imagining the characters come to life. Edward Cullen is supposed to be inhumanely beautiful, but Robert Pattinson (he's Cedric Diggory in the Harry Potter movie) ain't the perfect man for it. Honestly, judgemental side aside, he's not that "beautiful" to be Edward the Vampire master. Isabella Swan, portrayed by Kristen Stewart (Catch That Kid, Panic Room), well okay. She's fine to be Bella, BUT her acting. DANG!!! Robert Pattinson can act, Kristen can't. And his lips had more make-up than Kristen's.

Why is it that I can sense that Glutathione and Metathione would be even more famous here in the country? A lot would want to be vampire-white or Twilight-white then sport red/pink lipstick, not wash their hair (Edward, take a bath) and not comb at all (Edward again). "Have you Met?"

Now, how's the movie in a feeling-critic sense. The entire movie was like shot in macro mode! If you watched it closely, you could see their pores. Of course I'm just kidding because you can't possibly see their pores because of the heavy foundation and make-up they have on their faces. The good thing about that is the movie felt personal. Like you were just behind them, being the ultimate eavesdropper listening and watching them evade vampires, eat salad, glitter under the sun, drive like they're from The Fast and the Furious, and jump like crazy. Oh, the visual effects were.. let's say, not pretty for a sure-hit-profit-generating movie. It was like the production company allotted a small budget for the movie wherein I'm pretty sure they know the movie is going to be a blockbuster. Stephenie Meyer made a cameo. Some of the scenes I really like are: the super last scene (Victoria's), the part when the Cullens arrived (it's like Mean Girls, haha), and when they were all busy preparing food for Bella then she arrived saying she ate already. Watching with a room-full of teenage girls is funny and annoying at the same time. They scream like cheerleaders!

Also, Paramore's song Decode for the movie is not that much of a killer. I love Hayley and I'm in love with Paramore but Decode is... blah. Just like the series, Twilight and Decode are just overrated. They're like the Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan (you know how much I love Lindsay) of Hollywood.

What the heck. It's an entertaining movie. Don't watch it in expensive cinemas.


MORAL: Watch it and be amazed by Kristen Stewart's limited facial expressions and her "manly" voice and actions. Don't play harsh, I also have manly voice and actions. Haha. Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart complement each other.

Shampoo Tea

Whenever I see Nicole Scherzinger's shampoo commercial in the television, I can't help to think of my Situational Leadership class. Nicole Scherzinger, the lead Pussycat Doll (how do you call her? The big Pussycat? Uh.) The head teacher in my Situational Leadership class is the president of Procter and Gamble. Now, Nicole endorses Clear - a shampoo brand from Unilever.

A few nights ago, my dad mixed honey into my tea. He loves it and I think it's crap. When I drank it, my tongue automatically stuck out. Sheesh. Honey for me is fun if you take it spoonful. I don't really like the taste so I drank the tea "bottoms up" style. Dang. Honey tea my shiznit.

As I'm listening to Taylor Swift's Love Story (I like the song, it's cute. YES, I am capable of saying and typing the word "cute," now go back to reading.) I noticed that in the song, she sounds like Avril Lavigne in more than one circumstance. The high notes are like Avril reincarnated. Now I want to watch Bolt and still James Bond.


MORAL: Sometimes, it's all in the packaging. You buy it for the packaging not for the item itself. Sit back and watch the magic of advertising unravel right before your eyes. You'll be surprised by how powerful it is. Just read Coca-Cola's history and be amazed.

If I Were A Boy I'd Kiss A Girl in the Twilight

Katy Perry. That is the first and last time she'll be mentioned in this entry because she has absolutely nothing to do with what I'm going to type.

This is not a homosexual entry. It's just that Beyonce's song and video are total knockouts. The video and song combination is more lethal than Manny Pacquiao's left straight or hook or uppercut or whichever punch you want. I posted some of the lyrics of the song. I can't remember if I have posted lyrics before, but it doesn't matter. Read SOME (if you have the full lyrics you'd probably be smiling or nodding your skull with what you read) of the lyrics and think how could songwriters combine gut-wrenching lyrics and hypnotic melody together. Mix them all (or both) together and you get...... SASHA FIERCE.

Sing with us, Sasha!

If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I'd be a better man
I'd listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause he's taking you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed
I'd put myself first
And make the rules as I go
Cause I know that she'd be faithful,
Waiting for me to come home, to come home.
But you're just a boy
You don't understand
And you don't understand, ohhhh
How it feels to love a girl
Someday you wish you were a better man
You don't listen to her
You don't care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
Cause you're taking her for granted
And everything you had got destroyed
But you're just a boy

End the song with us, Sasha!


As usual, my title is about the least talked slant amongst the notoriously disorganized entries I type. I can change topic as fast as you can tie your shoelaces. Hmm. How fast is that?

If the Dark Side looks this good, it's so tempting to keep heart. I'd rather be in the dark, if you know what I mean. Honestly, I don't know what I meant with that. I just posted it because well, I just saw it in the Internet. I don't know why or how I came across this. Wow. Marat Safin is haunting me! This is going to be fun!

I can sense a lot of negative vibes in the next paragraph.

Twilight. What the hello?! It's a blood-sucking-I-mean-blood-draining anemic book. I don't know why people like (or love) Twilight. You know what will happen from the moment you have started reading the first book and yet a lot are eagerly waiting for the next part of the series! Stephenie Meyer did a fantastic job of prolonging the vampire love story. The only things I like in the series are the amazing front covers! They're so glossy and cool and amazing. Maybe the reason why people love the book is that others said it is good. Crap! It's just a topnotch because it is about vampires! Or is it because it is a love story? I have nothing against love stories, as a matter of fact, I loved Shakespeare's Hamlet. OK - Hamlet is a tragedy, but I like love stories, too. Vampires are hands down cool creatures except for the dark circles around their eyes which is the trend for students. Students don't sleep as well and sometimes they just eat when they're hungry (with the exception of others who keep on eating even if they're not hungry or those who keep on eating even after eating. *cough* me *cough*). Vampires, students, what's the difference. Stephenie Meyer did a good job of writing an interesting book and her publication did a magnificent job marketing her work. I have nothing against her. And the movie? I'm still going to watch it. It's a movie and I like apples and vampires and hands and the word "Twilight" because I like the song of Vanessa Carlton with the same title. Oh wait, I can hear Twilight lovers throwing rocks at our gate! Sudden question. Do female vampires have monthly periods?

After I heard her single Love Story, I downloaded (pirate!) Taylor Swift's new album Fearless, but I promise I'm going to get myself a copy of it. I'm just kind of short right now, hello, Christmas! All I can say is that if Taylor Swift can get herself inspired by love or something like it, she can write a bajillion of songs about love (what else is there to write about for teenagers?), relationships, you know the drill. See her hair? I told you it's divine! Must be tough brushing it, though.

Ooh, ooh. I've watched Madagascar 2 (James Bond, you're next okay? Don't fret. I didn't forget you.) and it's hilarious. My blockmates and I watched it and we were teasing each other because the adults who were there as well had kids with them. We were, "Crap, these kids will make a lot of noise during the movie. They'll laugh really hard." WRONG. (How do you type the sound of a buzzer? Bzzzzzzzz? But it's like the sound bees make. Oh well.) We were the ones who were laughing our carcasses out. Ok that's all I'm saying.


MORAL: Everyone has their own standards on what is nice, good, okay, and the likes. If you think a book you're reading is heaven-sent, another who's reading the same book is thinking it's the end-product of eating 500 Big Macs in 1 hour.

I still want to know. Even in theory. Do female vampires have monthly periods?